


Oh, Really?

by Sasa_Q



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: M/M, Married Qcard shenanagins, No Starfleet AU, but in a silly way
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-30
Updated: 2020-10-30
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:41:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27276676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sasa_Q/pseuds/Sasa_Q
Summary: "I wish there was no Starfleet.""Oh, really?"
Relationships: Jean-Luc Picard/Q
Comments: 4
Kudos: 29
Collections: Trektober 2020





	Oh, Really?

It had been a long day, one filled with bureaucracy. Picard was overseeing a peace treaty between two races, and had been sent in specially by Starfleet due to his prior experience with the subject. He was exhausted from the legal trickery and bickering. He just wanted to sit in his quarters with his husband and enjoy a nice hot cup of Earl Grey tea.

He collapsed on the couch in his quarters. A moment later, Q appeared.

"How was your day?" Q asked.

Picard groaned. "Don't even get me started," he said.

"That bad?" Q said.

"Yes," Picard said. "It's been that bad."

"Tell me all about it," Q said.

"I appreciate the offer, Q, but frankly, I'm sick of talking," said Picard. He sighed. "It's just been so stressful. I wish I never got assigned this mission. I wish I never had any experience on the subject, so they would have assigned someone else. You know what? I wish there wasn't any WAY I could have gotten assigned. I wish there was no Starfleet."

"Oh, really?" Q said.

A second later, they materialized somewhere on a planet that looked like Earth. "Q!" Picard said, exasperated. "I didn't MEAN it when I said I wish there was no Starfleet!"

"But you sounded so adamant about it!" Q said, fake-shocked.

"Enough of this, Q," Picard said. "Return me to the Enterprise."

"But aren't you a little curious about where you are right now?" Q asked.

Picard looked around. It was a wasteland, a huge abandoned city. "What's there to see?" he asked.

"This," Q said, "is Paris."

"This is Paris if there was no Starfleet?" said Picard.

"In this universe, there is no Starfleet. No United Federation of Planets," said Q. "Oh, I'm sure you wondering how it came to be so, but it doesn't matter. Every world is at war. Paris was the site of an alien attack some years ago."

"This is horrendous," Picard said. "I see your point. We need Starfleet. Just take me back to the Enterprise."

Q snapped his fingers. Nothing happened. A look of horror came over his face. "Oh no."

"Oh no what?" Picard exclaimed. "What's happened?"

"It's... it's not working!" Q said. "Something about the altered timeline... I don't have any powers!"

"Oh no," Picard said. "Oh no. Q, what are we going to do?" He spread his arms, indicating the world around him. "This place is a mess! How are we supposed to exist on this world? What even happened to humanity? Who controls the Earth? What-"

"Relax, relax, mon capitaine," Q said. "I was just kidding. I really do have my powers." He snapped his fingers and they returned unscathed to the Enterprise.

"Q!" Picard yelled. "That wasn't funny!"

"Not even a little bit?" Q asked, grinning.

Picard tossed a throw pillow at him. "You're hopeless," he said.

"You wouldn't have me any other way."

**Author's Note:**

> This was really silly, but I had a fun time writing it. Leave a comment if you enjoyed it too! :)


End file.
